Tactless
by Timcampy-chan
Summary: FE7. A collection of stories with a different tactician every time! The genre changes from chapter to chapter. Chapter 5: Canas makes a grand expedition into the tactician's tent and literally stumbles into some trouble! Multiple crossovers, so be ready!
1. Training

Hehehe. Procrastination is fun, but it ends up with lack up sleep. Which is bad. Um…Anyways! This'll be a series of stand-alone stories. If I feel like it, I might continue writing for one tactician. Some stories will be funny, and I have at least one planned that's darker. So stay tuned! They all feature a different tactician, and how much the difference in a tactician can affect the army. Some have got namesakes, so see if you can figure out who they're named after! The name of Chapter 1's tactician is a tweaked version of the name of a certain red-headed inventor who tortures a certain silver-haired advisor with her insane inventions. My tactician's much eviler, though. Bwahahahaha...

I don't own Fire Emblem, because if I did, the world would cease to exist as we know it. -shifty eyes-

Story time! Ready, steady, GO!

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Chapter 1: Analisa 

"Now. I'm sure you're all wondering why I've called you here," the tactician began. She paced back and forth before the three men, her long, green cloak fluttering in the breeze. The large garment made the short and slim girl seem even shorter and slimmer than she was, giving her the appearance of a child approaching her early teens. In reality, she was almost the age of the young woman who had found her unconscious on the rolling plains of Sacae.

"And why I've called you…here." Surrounding them was an ocean of green; the group of four was in a dense forest, the small clearing they were gathered in a tiny island in the sea of trees.

Erk stared at the tactician, utterly bewildered. _Called…? She dragged us here!_ he thought bitterly. His companions, fellow magic-wielders Canas and Lucius, had thoughts that were much less mutinous. To the young mage's right, the other purple-haired man was pre-occupied with observing a yellow bird that was making a nest in a nearby tree, and to Erk's left, the monk's pale sapphire eyes were focused intently on their captor. Lucius, being excessively generous, was the only one paying much attention to her.

"As you most certainly know," continued the tactician, brushing a caramel lock of hair out of her face, "the three of you are magic users." She stopped pacing, and turned to face them.

_Obviously...I could be doing something useful now…_Erk sighed. This was rather boring.

Lucius timidly raised his hand. "Um, excuse me, Lady Analisa…"

"Yes, Lucius?" The tactician smiled sweetly.

"Why exactly does whatever we are doing require us to be in a forest? We're a bit far away from camp, and they might need us back soon…"

"Nonsense, they'll be fine. Hmm…Where was I? Oh, Right. Since you all are magic users, all of your time is spent in studying your magic—"

"Quite so, Lady Analisa!" chirped Canas from far away, who had wandered away to further study the bird.

"COME BACK HERE, YOU IDIOT!!!" bellowed Analisa suddenly, with such force and rage that Lucius, Canas, and Erk all leapt up a few feet. No doubt, Canas ran back in terror. "Ahem." Clearing her throat, she regained her composure, and beamed innocently as if nothing had happened.

_What is with this girl…?Maybe Lady Lyndis should have picked another tactician…_mused Erk, now more cautious after that unusual outburst.

"Before someone rudely interrupted me by selfishly straying away," Analisa cast a harsh glare on Canas, who stared at the ground in embarrassment, "I was just getting to saying that you all have absolutely no time to work on your physical strength. You are at risk of being overpowered by some of the stronger opponents. And to top it off, none of you are very sturdy at all! Isn't that horrible? So I have graciously decided to train you three to increase your strength and endurance!"

"…That's stupid." Erk knew he was being blunt, but he had the feeling that if he didn't get out of this situation, there would be trouble.

Oh, how right he was…

"Don't you dare belittle my plans, you skinny little purple-haired--"

"What?!"

"I said, my plans are essential to winning! Our battle against Nergal, of course." She flashed a smile again, this one much, much more evil. Lucius took a step back, his eyes wide in fear; for a second he thought he saw a sinister glint in the seemingly innocent girl's eyes. "Now, go run laps," she commanded simply, with a casual wave of her hand.

"Laps…? Really?" Canas cocked his head to one side.

"Yes, laps," she replied brightly.

"B-but I can't!" stuttered the shaman. "I'm terribly slow, and I get tired easily—" With a flash of olive-colored cloth the tactician had grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and was holding him up in the air a few inches above the ground, despite the fact that she was much more petite than he. Lucius hid behind Erk, who was too paralyzed by shock to do a thing to help the poor man.

"GO. NOW," she snarled maliciously.

"Eeep! Yes, milady!" She released him, and Canas promptly ran the fastest he had ever run in his life, with Erk and Lucius close behind.

"Nice work, boys!" she called after them, grinning happily.

-----------

Later that evening…

"Hey, Priscilla. Have you seen Lucius?" Raven was getting worried. He hadn't seen him in a while, ever since that strange tactician girl had suddenly said she needed him for something…

"No, I'm afraid not…"

"Oh, I see." The crimson-haired mercenary looked to the nearby forest as the troubadour went about her own business. It had already been several hours. Where could he be?

Suddenly, Lucius emerged from the spot Raven had just been staring at, the monk's long blonde hair tangled and with several unusual things caught in it.

"Lucius!" Raven was taken aback by the disheveled appearance of his friend, and without delay, rose and began to carefully remove pinecones from Lucius's hair. "What the hell has that woman been making you do?!"

His eyes widened in sheer terror. "She…she…" he stammered.

"Oh, Lucius!" Analisa approached, waving enthusiastically at her victim—er, trainee. "Are you enjoying your training sessions with Canas and Erk and I?" As she reached him, she patted him on the shoulder. "You're doing very well! Keep up the good work!"

"Y-yes, Lady Analisa."

"So it was training, Lucius? I'm proud of you! It's about time you made yourself less wimpy." Raven laughed.

"Oh my, you're a mess. You should take better care of yourself. But now it's time for dinner! A warrior of the light must always keep his strength up, hm? Let's go!" And with that, she merrily dragged him off, not paying any attention at all to the fact that he was desperately mouthing the words 'help me' to his friend.

Unfortunately for Lucius, Raven didn't notice either.

* * *

If you've given up, the tactician was an eviler, more vicious version of Anissina from Kyou Kara Maou. xD

Thank you for reading! Please review!


	2. Excuses and a filler

Hey, loyal readers? (wait, are there even any loyal readers...?)

Sorry I haven't updated for a while; I was going to post a new chapter soon, but stuff came up, and I haven't had access to my laptop. Mainly because my parents suck and I haven't been doing too well in school lately, at least by my parents' standards. Seriously, a B isn't that horrible! Argh!

So I apologize, and as soon as I can convince them to let me have my laptop back I'll write and post the new chapter!

Meanwhile here's a bit of off-the-subject filler, spawned from an inside joke and boredom in Chemistry. It's not really Fire Emblem...but Guy appears in it! ("His name is GUY! How could he be a girl?!" "Mean parents?")

I don't own Guy (oh, how I wish I did... -evil laughter-), but my friends own themselves and I own myself. I also don't own Jack Sparrow or that song about the chapel.

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Announcements echoed through the spacious airport as hundreds of people stood in line, ran to their flights, or walked to no direction in particular while waiting for boarding to start. Standing in the baggage checking line was a blonde girl, no more than 17 years old. She placed a few of her things onto the conveyor belt: a duffel bag, a suitcase, and finally, a large cargo box that seemed to have sounds coming from it...

"Shut up!" Lexi muttered under her breath as she lightly punched the box. The contents grew silent, but the man monitoring the x-ray machine cast her a confused glance. His facial expression changed from confused to...well, utterly confused as the box passed through the x-ray and showed the skeletons and internal organs of what appeared to be 3 humans.

"Oh! Don't worry! They're not alive," Lexi reassured the man, whose eyes widened in fear. "No, I don't mean it like that!!" she added frantically, "They're cadavers! For...umm...science. Yes. And they're cows. Mutated. So they're not humans, they're cows." The girl cursed one of the people in the box for coming up with such a lame excuse.

A member of the airport personnel approached the young woman's box. "I'm sorry miss, but I'm going to have to check what's---" She broke off at the sight of another teenager--this time a boy. Wearing a tutu."What the...?"

"Plea! Plea!" Joe cried, a little nervous because the author was too lazy to figure out how to spell the strange ballet term and didn't know how to use accent marks.

"And you thought I was a girl." Guy appeared out of nowhere. The Sacaen swordsman kicked the box, causing something inside it to squeal. He walked away, disappearing into nowhere again.

Joe sprinted away, singing a random song about a chapel and screaming for rum, and most of the airport security followed him, leaving Lexi free to open the box.

"Are you guys okay?" she asked.

"Peachy," replied a girl, who was upside down. Her hair, a medium between blonde and brown, was disheveled. Her companions, a black-haired girl and a brunette, were both unconscious because they had forgotten to add air holes and the blonde/brown-haired girl had an unusually large lung capacity.

Finally, after waking the two in the box (and coaxing the brunette, who claimed it was comfy, out of the box) the three followed Lexi to Japan and had super-happy-fun exchange student adventures. Yay!

-------

And as for Joe? He went back to Vegas and his wife-to-be left him at the altar. Again.

"I'm! Going to the chapel and I'm! Gonna get...ma-ma-marrieeedddd!!!" sobbed the poor sad drunken teen, blowing his nose on a bride's veil (hey, it's a chapel in Vegas, what do you expect? They're not going to wait, they'll skip to the next marriage!).

"Do you mind?!" she exclaimed.

"No. Do you have any rum?" he asked.

"Sorry, mate, all gone," said Jack Sparrow, staggering in with a fangirl clinging to his head. He clutched the last bottle in his unsanitary pirate hand.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooo!!!" screamed Joe, sinking to his knees in a Vader-yell.

------

And everyone lived happily ever after. I think. 

* * *

I can't believe you bothered to read that. xD I was in that! See if you can guess who I was; I didn't play a very interesting role, though... 


	3. If You Were Gay

Hi, guys! I'm officially not in trouble with my folks any more, so I'm good to write and post the real second chapter. I apologize for that horrible filler...

Will's name will have 2 'l's because it was a translation error and it's really supposed to be that way. And I randomly saw the tactician's name in a book with names and their meanings, and thought it sounded cool. I was going to pick a name that didn't start with 'A', since the first tactician's name started with 'A'... next time I'll be more creative and pick a name that has a meaning behind it. I'm so ashamed...and to top it all off, my Fire Emblem game committed suicide!! EVERYTHING got deleted! -sobs- 4 years of my life got thrown away! And I was almost done with the game, too...

I don't own Fire Emblem. If I did, I'd figure out how to restore my lost data...and I don't own the song the tactician sings or the musical it's from, nor have I actually seen it.

And this is dedicated to D. Gray-Myu, for the awesome skit they did with this song. Hehehe, I wish I could have seen it live, Rabi violating Kanda was hilarious...

Ready, steady, go!

* * *

"Maybe I'll ask the tactician to buy me a new cot…this old thing is falling apart," he said to himself, staring at his cot thoughtfully. With a sigh, the Pherean bowman gingerly sat down on the lumpy mass. As if in reply to his musings, a large amount of straw spewed out the side of his weary bed. Shaking his head, the auburn-haired youth ignored it, choosing instead to pick up a bow and adjust the bowstring. "So useless..."

"Hellooo, Will? Are you in there?" called a familiar voice from outside the tent, one the archer had often heard shouting commands to him and his comrades in battle.

"Yup, go ahead and come in, Aidan!" replied Will, who immediately brightened up and set down his bow. He could fix it later; company was more exciting. Besides, this was the perfect time to confront his commander about the horrible condition his bed was in...

"Hi, Will!" called the tactician, poking his head into the tent. His thin frame soon followed, clothed in earthen-colored robes that were much too big for him. The mid-day warmth permitted the removal of his jade mantle, which was slung over his shoulder.

"Hi." Will grinned. It was nice to have such a friendly tactician in their company; he was beginning to think that almost the people in the army were, or had been, problem children. Quite a few of his fellow soldiers weren't terribly social, despite the fact that he tried his best to get them to open up. Take Rath, for example. Yesterday he'd been a regular--

Aidan abruptly broke Will from his thoughts, causing him to jump a little. "Hey, Will. We need to talk about something." His cheery expression disappeared, replaced with a frown. The topic was serious.

"Ah! Hahaha, you scared me. What is it?" asked Will.

"I've noticed lately that you've been talking to some of the new recruits, and making them feel welcome. You're a good guy, Will."

"Heh. Thanks." It was nice to be appreciated, too.

"But remember when Raven first joined up? You were always hanging around him."

"Huh? Yeah, I was just trying to---"

"And I've seen the way you look at Rath."

"Wait, what are you talking about? Where are you going with this?" demanded Will. If he knew Aidan, this was definitely not going anywhere good.

"So, anyways, you'll never guess what happened to me this morning at breakfast!" Aidan said, beaming, returned to his original happy mood.

"Why did you change the subject...?"

"Legault was smiling at me, and talking to me...He was being real friendly." The young tactician placed extra emphasis on the word 'friendly', his eyes fixed upon the archer with all the gravity he could muster as if this small detail meant life or death.

"Umm..."

"I think..." Ignoring Will, he placed a hand on his chin and stared at the roof of the tent, until his eyes widened as he came upon a sudden revelation. He turned back to Will, who was now confused and distressed, and exclaimed, "I think he was coming on to me! I think he might've thought that I--" Here, Aidan dramatically gestured to himself, "was gay!"

At this statement, the previously intent listener froze, breaking into a cold sweat. "Um, why are you telling me this?" he said, eyes shiftily darting from side to side. "Why should I care? I don't care."

"Oh, Will, you don't have to get all defensive about it--"

"I'm NOT getting defensive!!" The archer, to his surprise, found that he had risen from his seat. _Why am I getting so worked up over this...? This is insane!_ he thought.

"I didn't mean anything by it. I just wanted to be able to talk about it with you."

"Aidan, can we please talk about this later? I have to...umm...fix my bow! Yeah!" He grabbed his weapon roughly and held it over his head, triumphantly flaunting his ticket out of an awkward conversation.

"Yeah, but..."

"Conversation over."

"Wait!"

"Over!" Will began to shove the smaller teen out the door, but he stopped when he heard the sound of a cheery piano melody floating through the air despite the fact that they probably hadn't been invented yet. "Huh...?" While he was distracted, Aidan took advantage of the moment and ran back in the tent.

"Okay, but just so you know...

...If you were gay," he sang, to the tune of the piano.

"Oh, Elimine, no!" cried Will, covering his ears."

"That'd be okay.  
I mean 'cause hey!  
I'd like you anyway." Aidan patted the archer on the head, causing him to groan.  
"Because you see,  
If it were me,  
I would feel free to say  
That I was gay!  
But I'm not gay," he added hastily.

"Aidan, please!" begged Will. "I'm trying to fix my bow. And where is that music coming from?" Instead of replying (or leaving, as Will ferverently hoped), Aidan stared at him, grinning foolishly. "What?"

"If you were queer," continued the tactician.

"Ah, Aidan!!"

"I'd still be here."

"I'm trying to--"

"Year after year!"

"Aidan!"

He attacked Will in the form of a strangling hug. "Because you're dear to me."

"Ack!"

"And I know that you," sang the tactician, releasing the archer and pointing at him almost accusingly.

"What?"

"Would accept me too,"

"I would?"

"If I told you today,  
'Hey, guess what?  
I'm gay!'  
But I'm not gay," he added a second time.

"But I'm not--"

"You should be happy,  
Just being you!  
So what should it matter to me  
What you do in bed with guys?" Aidan slapped the worn cot gleefully.

"Dear Saint Elimine! Aidan, that's just wrong!" exclaimed Will, jumping off the bed like he really had...well, you know.

"No, it's not! Why do you think it's all ruined?" Will cringed.  
"If you were gay,  
I'd shout,  
'Hooray!!'"

"I'm not listening!!" Will put his fingers in his ears and began humming a tune.

"And here I'd stay,"

"La la la la la!!!" As a last resort, Will started towards the door, only to have Aidan, still singing, block the door.

"But I wouldn't get in your way,"

"Please!"

"You can count on me  
To always be  
Beside you every day,  
To tell you it's okay,  
You were just born that way,  
And, as they say,  
It's in your DNA!  
You're gay!"

"B-but I'm not gay!" stammered Will.

"If you WERE gay."

"Waaah!" Throwing his hands up into the air in defeat, Will finally pushed the struggling tactician out the door.

"Bye, Will!!" called Aidan, falling on his face outside the tent.

Will sighed and massaged his temples. "Elimine, what the flux was I thinking when I joined this army?"

* * *

Thanks for reading, please review! 


	4. The Shadow of Death

Finally, another serious fic! It seems I'm always stuck writing funny stories. It must just be me though, because my mood has to correspond with what I'm writing. Heh, nothing a little depressing music can't fix!

I do not own Fire Emblem. And I haven't gotten farther than chapter 22 in the game, so please forgive me if this fic contradicts something.

* * *

_Chapter 4: The Shadow of Death_

Darkness enveloped the camp, the new moon out of sight and stars nowhere to be seen. The last embers of a forgotten campfire smoldered with columns of silver smoke rising into the black night. Its dim and quickly waning light revealed the presence of a young man, seated . His cold eyes, obscured by a cape of coarse viridian cloth, surveyed the tents of the sleeping warriors, and they then stared off into the distance...as if he was waiting...

Into his narrow line of vision appeared the frame of his lady. As several in their company had remarked, she was a beauty, indeed, as he had noted on several occasions; the long, deep turquoise hair that cascaded down her back, her aesthetic frame, and her warm smile had charmed many a man. Perhaps, even, the humble commander of the motely group of fighters they called an army.

"Milady." He rose and promply bowed respectfully to his liege. "What brings you here at such an hour?" he inquired. It was indeed rather late--the only ones left awake were the tactician and a scattered handful of night guards.

She motioned for him to sit back down, as she was never one for the strict social practices of nobility. "I was just getting some air. And making sure that Kent went to bed and let Marcus take over the watch."

"Please forgive me, but is Kent not able to quit his duty on his own?"

Lyn sighed. "...The truth is...I wanted to talk to you, Luke."

"Oh?" The tactician's eyebrows raised slightly in curiousity, although not visible to the woman before him. "About what, Lady Lyndis?"

"Your...your tactics. They have been rather--"

"Ah. That mess." Luke smiled darkly. "Milady, I was only acting with your best interests at heart. After all, I heard you just the other day speaking of how Sir Sain's behavior was--"

"If Eliwood didn't intervene at the last minute Sain could've died!" she shouted, anger and the beginnings of tears in her blue-green eyes. "He was getting on my nerves, but how could you try and kill him?!"

"Sir Sain is a fool," he stated with an icy tone in his voice. "War offers no place for oafs such as he."

"Sain has stood by me in my time of need, and I'm going to stand for him. I will not allow anyone, even you, to speak ill of him," hissed Lyn.

"Is that so?" He smiled a smile corrupted by hate.

"...What's happened to you, Luke? How could you have changed so much in just a year? Where is the friend that helped me find my grandfather?" Her expression was pained. Her statement was true; she and a few of the others who had helped Lyn to defeat her granduncle had noticed a severe change in the young tactician's nature. Where there had once been a kind and outspoken boy now sat a cold and secretive individual. How it had happened, none knew..."I...I have thought long and hard about this. I've asked myself and others a question so many times, I cannot count...but..." She tightly clenched her fists, her nails digging into the palm of her hand.

"Go on."

"I am afraid I have to discharge you from our company."

Silence.

"I'm sorry, Luke. But it's for the best. I appreciate all that you've done, but...it's time we parted ways..."

He stood, his back to Lyn. "I understand completely. I will be gone before you wake, milady."

"A-are you sure you'll be all right?"

"I'll manage."

Something held Lyn from saying a proper goodbye. She knew not what, but she continued to recite in her mind, "It's for the best. It's for the best," as if it was an incantation that could take away this old Luke and bring back her cherished friend. But she knew that he was gone. Somehow, he had changed...and all she had left of him were memories. These memories replayed in her mind as she walked without a word back to her tent. As she slipped inside and the hem of her dress disappeared from view, he lifted his golden eyes up to the equally empty and emotionless sky.

"Hmph. A shame, indeed. If I had only stayed for a little while longer..." Removing his hood, his raven hair tied back in a ponytail was revealed, although none could see. None but the blank eyes of the still and lifeless corpse of the true tactician lying not far away sheltered under a large tree, nourishing and tainting the tree with his spilled blood.

"Oh well. At least I have found some excellent sources of quintessence. As well as quite a bit of other useful information...Lord Nergal will be pleased."

In a flash of light and a whirl of a cloak Ephidel was gone, leaving nothing but a stray shadow.

* * *

Thank you for reading! I hope that the ending was unexpected, that's what I was going for. I was originally planning to name the tactician something like Delphi (anagram of Ephidel) but it sounded a bit girly. Luke came from the song I was listening to when I started writing this down: Luca by Brand New. Lucas reminded me of the guy from that one thing in Disney, so Luke it was!

Anyways, please review!


	5. An Intriguing Expedition

I'm sorry! I've had a bit of writer's block with this story. Plot bunnies are scampering about in my head but almost none are for this story. And a potential _Tactless_ chapter turned into a full fic! _Turnabout Troubadour, _the Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney style murder mystery and trial, is coming soon. I've been lazy writing that, too, so...XD

There are several allusions to other animes and games in this chapter. See if you can figure out them all. And this chapter is a bit short...

I do not own Fire Emblem or the other things that will be alluded to in this chapter.

* * *

"Lady Dawn...?" called a voice from outside the canvas tent for the third time. "Lord Eliwood has been looking for you..." For the third time, there was no answer. The man sighed. 

Canas poked his purple-haired head into the temporary dwelling of the currently absent tactician.

"Milady?" His eyes, one through a monocle, scanned the room for the young woman. "It seems she is not here," he mumbled to himself, stepping into the room. "I should leave now."

"...

..."

With a squeal he ran towards Dawn's desk and the various souveniers from her travels. He had never been in the tactician's quarters, and, curious as always, he was ecstatic to be able to freely explore them.

"Wha-what's this?! So intriguing!!" The scholar, barely able to contain his excitement, was gazing longingly at a small crystal that glowed pale green inside a glass bottle. Hurriedly setting it down he grabbed another container, this one housing a red stone that shifted and moved like a liquid. "How interesting..."

After gently replacing the two bottles, he observed the remainder of the area. Unusual objects were everywhere--a pure white feather with delicate pink detail, a suspicious-looking cardboard box, and---

"Is that a steel arm!?"

As he rushed toward it to get a closer look, his lower body was obscured by a flurry of white. Looking down he saw that sheets of paper, no doubt battle tactics, nearly coated the entire floor, and these papers were covered in diagrams and notes scribbled in the margins. Even the small cot in the corner had fallen victim to the mess, but the pile of plans was weighted down by small statue.

Intrigued, the shaman approached the tactician's bed. The statue was very odd, depicting a man that seemed to be deeply contemplating something. "Oh my, a scholar just like me!" remarked Canas happily. "But why is he nude? Such a vulgar object should not be in the possession of an innocent young girl like Lady Dawn! But nevertheless! Could he perhaps be wondering where his garments have gone?" He attempted to pick it up, but utterly failed and dropped it on his foot.

Crying out in pain, he mentally cursed whoever had made the wretched thing so heavy. (Somewhere else, a sandy-haired man shivered, sensing a bad omen...)

"I've had enough! I should most definitely not be in Lady Dawn's room without her permission," he exclaimed, scolding himself and attempting to hurry outside...but he was met by something small and round under his right foot that caused him to slip and fall among the sea of papers.

"Ouch!" He sat up and rubbed the back of his head as numerous strategies floated to the ground like snow. Digging through the papers he found the object he had tripped on: a metallic ball, painted crimson and white. He picked it up and saw that it easily fit in the center of his palm.

"What could this be...?" muttered Canas. The shaman lightly poked a raised circle in the center, causing the sphere to expand. It was now roughly the size of his hand.

"Ack!" Startled, he dropped the orb and it split neatly in half. "Oh no! I-I-I've broken it!" he stuttered, eyes wide, and he knelt to the ground to pick it up...

But a flash of red and white light followed...

And a golden-yellow, furry animal was staring him in the face.

His face immediately brightened up. "What a strange creature, indeed!"

The animal cocked its head to the side. "Pikachu."

"Ah! You can speak?! What language is that? Is it your native tongue? Or is it just the call of your species, my good fellow?"

"Pika! Pika pika chu!" demanded the frustrated critter, its onyx eyes fixed upon those of the monocled man before him.

"Excuse me? I'm afraid I don't understand--"

"Piiiika..." Sparks appeared on the red cheeks of the creature. "CHUUUUU!!!" it screeched, as the sparks became thunderbolts that shocked the unsuspecting shaman.

Canas, blackened and burnt to a crisp, removed his monocle and wiped the ash off of it with his robe. "Well! You can use thunder magic!" He coughed out dark smoke. "What an amazing...creature...indeed," he said weakly before finally collapsing in a heap onto the floor, unconscious.

----

He heard the indistinct shouting of a female voice, and the strange language of the thing that had attacked him, spoken in a guilty tone...

His eyes opened drearily to see the tactician standing over him, the red and white ball in her hand.

"Canas! Are you all right?!" she inquired, her expression filled with worry as she knelt down beside him. "I hope Sparky didn't hurt you too badly..."

"Who? What? ...I...I smell fried pork..."

She sighed and shook her head. "Maybe you should just ask me next time if you want to see my things. Curiosity killed the cat. Or, in this case, electrocuted the shaman, I guess."

* * *

Hahaha. Crossovers are fun. Don't worry, no shamans were hurt in the making of this fic--Priscilla quickly came to the rescue after a few minutes, and anima mages are always getting Canas with Thunder spells, so he's used to it. 

The name Sparky is the nickname a trainer gave their Pikachu in the Pokemon anime. (How did I remember that?! That was years ago!) Dawn is the default name for the Diamond/Pearl female trainer.

In case you wanted to know, the crossovers are D. Gray-man (an innocence), Fullmetal Alchemist (philosopher's stone, automail), Tsubasa: Reservoir Chronicles (one of Sakura's feathers), Metal Gear Solid (Snake's trademark cardboard box), Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney (Thinker statue and Larry, the guy who made it), and, of course, Pokemon (Pokeball and Pikachu).

Thank you for reading and please review!


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